letters that have been written in my heart, to those people i miss
dear adam (elder mikkleson),
EPIC FAIL. i promise i didn't forget about you for all these months! i will write you soon. i will. wo ai ni. not in the mushy way. but you were one of my bestest friends last year. i miss you. i miss the way you sing shakira- and you sound as good, if not better, than shakira does when she sings! i miss you being so happy when it finally started being spring on campus and the night air was infused with the smell of blossoms. i miss being able to text you when neal was being a dumb boy. and then you would comfort me. you even walked up to the temple with me that one night when i was a mess! i don't let very many people see me cry- so consider yourself... lucky, i guess. i miss seeing you drink eggs. yup plain old eggs. that is so gross adam, i hope you don't do that in taiwan because i'm pretty sure the eggs there aren't pasteurized. i miss your crazy dancing. and i'm really glad you didn't rip those white pants- they were pretty dang tight. i miss your insanity. your creeper-ness. your really really loud voice. just so you know- i think you are awesome. you are probably the most bomb.com missionary taiwan has ever seen. and don't worry i'm still on the lookout for a wife for you who looks and sings like beyonce and is taller than me!
love,
beka
p.s. its your birthday tomorrow. so happy birthday!
dear mckay (elder scoffield),
my most favorite man from the bay area! you opened my eyes to a whole new world! we are most alike than we think... i think. i hope i get a letter from you real soon. i miss talking to you! you have always been so easy to talk to. remember that one night at the beginning of school when i was super angry and i felt like the only one i could talk to was you? so we walked up to the temple and we sat on the lawn and just talked. about politics. life. our dreams. getting out of boring old provo. we were gonna go work for del sol together remember? i'm still game if you are! i say lets go to hawaii or the bahamas ok? then there was that night at the end of the year when we drove up to rock canyon with morgan and amy and sat on her suburban and just sat and talked. about what was coming next. the end of freshman year. the end of life as we loved it. missions. and you scared us half to death with those creepy stories! summer was the best. i loved being able to call you. and we talked forever. you helped me when my friends were being dorks. you are such a rebel, but without a cause. inside you're a softy. admit it. but hey, i love both sides of you. don't let brazil bring you down. in fact, i hope it lifts you up!
love,
beka
dear amy and natalie,
wow. heavenly father sure knows me. he knew i needed a little cheering up tonight and he so sent you to do it. i don't know if you know how inspired you were to study on the first floor. i miss laughing at ridiculous jokes with you. talking about boys. pulling pranks on kimball 2010. especially pranks on evan. oh boy. natalie- i miss smelling your homemade bread when i come home from class. and of course getting a warm piece from you. i miss your awesome laugh. amy- thanks for being there for me last year. i never knew how much it meant to me until now when it is totally different. you are possibly one of the most hilarious people i have ever met. oh i just love you. thank you both. i miss you but i know we have many great adventures ahead!
loves and kisses,
beka
dear nate (elder peterson),
i just thought you should know that peanut butter and oreos is really so good! you just don't know it yet. thanks for those late night talks last year. and for surviving alvarez with me. she was crazy. i took anatomy this semester. remember when i helped you study for that? wow that class is hard! but totally worth it right? keep it real out there in alabama. i'll drop you a letter soon. promise!
beka
dear neal (elder ferrin),
best friend. where do i even begin? there is way too much to say about how much i miss you. see its like this: someone sucker punches you in the pit of your stomach. but you have to keep going on with life because its not going to stop for you to recover. so you ignore the pain. put it in the back of your mind. bury it with obligations, school, studying, work, sleep, and running. but it won't stay hidden forever. inevitably the pain comes out and then you curl up on the floor wanting to die because it hurts so bad. graphic sorry.
i miss seeing you every morning at 7:45 to walk to class. even when i had to text you to wake you up. i miss that i could go find you whenever i wanted (pretty much)and we could talk. i miss our fights. haha. i guess every healthy relationship has to have them. looking back, they helped us i think. i miss waffle wednesday. remember how on your birthday we had them with chocolate chips and PB? artery cloggers! i miss how i helped you shave your legs- what was i thinking! i miss watching castle and psych with you. i'm addicted to psych now by the way. i miss sitting by you in church, even when you could have sit by other girls. remember when we walked up to the temple and all the missionaries there thought we were dating? and then we had to be awkward because we weren't. ha ha that was fun. but weird because you were almost a missionary. that day was one of the top 5 hardest in my life. remember when i came up to millville and we jumped on the trampoline with your siblings. i love them. they are awesome. oh wait- you are awesome. i could go on. but i won't. i might need some memories for the year that you have left. i just wanted to know i've been reliving all our great and bad times. i miss you. but not enough to have you not be on a mission. you are the best missionary! i hope you baptize all those chinese people!
love,
beka
dear nate (elder hainsworth),
i love that we have gotten so much closer. you are one of my best friends. remember when we went to the space center with orchestra? haha it was right after we took that horrible SAT. well you wrote all these notes to me bc i was communications and you were co-pilot. did you know that i kept all those notes? yeah... they're in my journal from senior year. maybe i'll show you someday. remember when we went to sweater swing and won at three legged twister? we were basically awesome! i miss joking and "arguing" with you in calculus. chase was hilarious. i miss eating almonds in orchestra and slacking off on solo- ensemble. we played the Bach Double! Ha! but we had fun doing it! homecoming dance was the best dance of my high school life. i could not have been asked by a better guy. who was it again? oh yeah. you! ice skating. pizza. and then it took us like three hours to get home from provo! remember how we sang rent in the car? but i was scared to sing in front of all you chamber people. speaking of chamber, thanks for letting me come along and do valegrams with you. you were so nice about it. it meant so much to me. you never made me feel stupid. or ugly. or un-cool. you are nice 100% of the time. how could i ask for a better friend! you support me even now. your letter buoy me up. thanks! i hope you know i'm praying for you out there in North Carolina! keep it up and come home on a high!
love,
beka
dear family,
i love you. thanks for your support. i feel sad when you are sad. i am happy for you when things go good. i wish i was more like ya'll. but thanks for encouraging me to be myself. even if it is a little outside the norm :)
love you lots!
beka
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