20 February 2012

i'm sorry but...

you know what sucks?
ew. i hate using that word. but there. i used it.

feeling totally and completely boring.
being glad you have to studying on your day off school because no one invited you to do anything cool.
friends who think they can use you and their convenience.
people constantly asking you why you aren't dating someone because you are "so amazing/beautiful/nice/etc." [people if i knew, then this wouldn't be a problem!]
when it feels like the only way you can get attention is by writing a pathetic "feel-sorry-for-me" blog post.
when your work out buddy stops being your work out buddy
missing uganda and everything about it- yes, even the power outages and cold showers
having to take a physics test tomorrow and realizing you aren't even close to prepared
friends flaking out on you
wondering if well wishers are sincere
knowing that you can do anything with your life, but not know what to do
knowing that someday your prince will come, but still being jealous of your friends who have found theirs
cold weather
not being able to study because your mind is in a million places
missing someone. someone who might not care about you as much as you care about them
not having money
people not understanding your struggles or your family's struggles
pre-med students laughing and judging your dreams
wondering when you will see precious ugandan friends again

yeah. they suck.
and right now, i can't escape it.

1 comment:

  1. You are so beautiful and talented! I mean that in the most genuine and sincere way. I'm sorry those around you aren't treating you the way you deserve. I wish I lived in Utah so that we could hang out all the time. Hang in there and if you need someone to talk to- I'm here!