08 July 2012

making girls happy (and other thoughts)

i realize that most of my posts about dating are depressing and even critical. i don't want anyone to think that i am cynical or angry when it comes to dating or men. for the last week i've been reflecting on the many nice things that different boys have done for me- acts that have made me feel special and cared for. do you remember this card that i posted a couple weeks ago? well guys it's true. you really don't have to do anything grandiose to make a girl fall for you. i've been blessed to have many great men and boys do kind things for me. here are just a few:

- when i was sixteen at EFY i had to leave very early Saturday morning so my mom and i could make the 12 hour drive back to Utah from Calgary. one of the boys in my company knew about it and knew that i was super sad to be leaving everyone. so he got all the boys in my company to wake up before 6 am the next morning and meet me outside my dorm to say good-bye. it was the kindest thing! he became one of my best friends and i truly appreciate his friendship.
- when i graduated from high school my older brother picked me up, took me to lunch, and gave me a picture frame that he had painted himself. another time when i was a sophomore in college, he brought me ice cream when i was having a bad day.
- i dated this boy who planned a special easter egg hunt for me in snowy rexburg because he knew that i wasn't going to be spending easter with my family. he even got me an easter basket with McDonald's for breakfast!
- there were some boys we had dinner group with who helped me realize when my boyfriend was treating me like dirt. they told me that i deserved better. and thankfully i believed them, and got out of that relationship.
- i went out with this boy for a little bit who would send me good morning texts every day. it was the best way to start off my day.
- this boy brought me frozen yogurt while i was at work. i always wanted a boy i liked to come visit me at work, but he was the first one to ever do that. and it was a total surprise!
- i went on a date with a guy, and i was little self conscious about how i looked after working 9 hours that day. he told me i looked beautiful.
- i was running a 10K the other day and came in after my little brother. as i neared the finish line, he found me and ran to the finish with me.

guys (and girls), it really is about the little things! i don't know if i've ever been in love. but i've felt love. and i've given love. i don't know that i've found my eternal love (most likely not) but i know he is out there and that he will love me as much as i love him.
my sister-in-law told me once that love=sacrifice. while i was dating The Missionary i thought that that meant a sacrifice of who i really was and what i thought was important. i thought it meant doing anything (even compromising your opinion of yourself and letting yourself be dragged through the mud) to keep the relationship going. after we broke up and kind of hated that phrase about love and sacrifice. i felt like it wasn't true. but today i realized that it is true. we should sacrifice who we are to be in love with someone. but we do need to sacrifice our pride and selfishness. we should sacrifice the immediate gratification in order to reach the ultimate goal of an eternal marriage. we should sacrifice what might be "good" for something better and lasting.
so i'm gonna keep looking and searching, praying and hoping, and loving everyone, until i find him. it will be all worth it.


  1. Beka! You are such a loving, kind person! I can say that since I have been BFFs with you for most of our lives. I enjoyed your post and you are so right that it is the little things that matter! And you deserve the best! Can't wait to meet the guy you marry cause he's going to be AWESOME!

  2. i love this!! you are just too cute! :) You will find him and he is out there looking for you! Love you :)